I'm trying to control my weight...
It's not working...
Over the last week I have noticed something, as I refuse to eat those high-fat foods I have been eating...
... it's a similar feeling to when I stopped smoking.
My thoughts go to food.
There are imagined visualisations of the procedure to obtain the food I subconsciously want.
But when I say NO to myself, it's a minor tantrum in my head.
Immediately I feel severe depression and anxiety about not doing it.
These are all the same reactions I had when I was stopping smoking. The thought of what needed to be done to achieve it. The thoughts of what I wanted. But the depression, stress, anxiety, when I refused myself what it thought I needed.
Just typing this now is making me think of it but I can't stop the feelings that it's generating when I refuse to comply with the thoughts.
I'm going to try this weekend to severely cut the amount of food I eat and the type of food I eat.
There was a period when I was losing a lot of weight where the only thing I was eating was rice. I plan to do that again this weekend in an attempt to remind myself I can.
I kinda have to mention it somewhere as it feels like a sort of promise to myself that requires action. I'm not the kind of person who can do anything for himself. I only seem capable of doing things if people ask me to do them. So the only thing I can think of doing, without explicitly getting someone to tell me, is to tell the world I'm doing it. It feels like a sort of promise to the nameless masses that I'll do it... I'll feel a bit honour-bound to do it this way.
It's not working...
Over the last week I have noticed something, as I refuse to eat those high-fat foods I have been eating...
... it's a similar feeling to when I stopped smoking.
My thoughts go to food.
There are imagined visualisations of the procedure to obtain the food I subconsciously want.
But when I say NO to myself, it's a minor tantrum in my head.
Immediately I feel severe depression and anxiety about not doing it.
These are all the same reactions I had when I was stopping smoking. The thought of what needed to be done to achieve it. The thoughts of what I wanted. But the depression, stress, anxiety, when I refused myself what it thought I needed.
Just typing this now is making me think of it but I can't stop the feelings that it's generating when I refuse to comply with the thoughts.
I'm going to try this weekend to severely cut the amount of food I eat and the type of food I eat.
There was a period when I was losing a lot of weight where the only thing I was eating was rice. I plan to do that again this weekend in an attempt to remind myself I can.
I kinda have to mention it somewhere as it feels like a sort of promise to myself that requires action. I'm not the kind of person who can do anything for himself. I only seem capable of doing things if people ask me to do them. So the only thing I can think of doing, without explicitly getting someone to tell me, is to tell the world I'm doing it. It feels like a sort of promise to the nameless masses that I'll do it... I'll feel a bit honour-bound to do it this way.
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